10:00PM I should go to bed now. A responsible person who prioritizes sleep would go to bed right now. Ok, I will do that… after just one quick episode of this old sitcom I’ve been watching.

12:00AM Ugh. I should really go to bed now.

12:10AM WAAAAAAAAH! Can my one-year-old hear my eyes close?

2:00AM Chhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Huh? Oh, my husband’s in the bathroom. He must be getting ready for bed.

2:20AM THUD. Thump thump thump thump. “Mommy? I had a bad dream…”

2:55AM Must have been quite the nightmare. My three-year-old wouldn’t let me leave the room until he fell asleep. Hello, there, pillow. It’s lovely to feel you again…..

3:00AM WAAAAAAAAH! Ugh. Do you have to wait until I get all comfy?

3:15AM Thumpthump. Thumpitythumpthumpthump. Scratch scratch scratch. Really cat? You have the friskies now?!

3:20AM Ghnnnn….Ghnnnn…Ghnnnn. How does my husband sleep through all this? It’s fair game to poke him so he wakes just enough to stop the snoring right? Poke

3:21AM …….

3:22AM Ghnnnn….Ghnnnn…Ghnnnn. Well, that was short-lived.

3:25AM Oh shoot aren’t those library books due soon? I’ll have to go today. But when will I have time? Maybe I can run over after dropping the kids off at daycare. Yeah. No wait… they don’t open until 9. What day is tomorrow? Thursday? I have that morning meeting tomorrow; I don’t know if I can get back in time. I guess I could go during lunch time. Ugh, but then I’ll have to figure out another time to pump. And I wanted to squeeze in a shower tomorrow too. I need a shower. It’s been too long. I feel gross. Did I remember to switch over the laundry before bed? I don’t have any clean underwear, I hope I remembered to switch the laundry. I’m hungry…

4:30AM Chirrup! Chirp chirp! It’s still dark out. Why on Earth are there birds that sing this early?

5:00AM THUD. Thump thump thump thump. My three-year-old. “Mommy… I have to pee!”

5:45AM WAAAAAAAH! My one-year-old. If I’m lucky, I can get her back to sleep

6:30AM Well, it’s too late to get more sleep. I’ll just zone out on my phone, I guess.

6:58AM THUD Thump thump thump thump. “Mommy! It’s time to get up!”

7:00AM Beep beep beep. Why do I even set a wake-up alarm?

Thankfully, the vast majority of my nights are not like this. But every now and again, there’s a doozy. Most nights I can expect 2-3 of these disrupters. Be kind to the parents in your life, everyone, the restless nights can happen well beyond the newborn stage.